Ah, the joys of being a dad. Benefits include reduced sleep, second-guessing yourself at every turn, and pure insanity.
Awake at 3:30 a.m., stressing about what could have happened at Target today. See, the Seattle Target location across from Northgate Mall is really high up in the air, and there's a sort of skybridge from the parking garage leading to the store doors.
The skybridge is about 25 ft wide, with a 4ft-wide fence-type railing all along the sides with no gaps. So it's like, secure, you know? But it's still high up in the air. You can look over the edge and see how far you could fall.
I'm scared of heights. Guess I should throw that out there.
So what does Lucy do when we're walking back to the car? Makes a move to climb on the railing! She puts grabs the top bar with both hands and puts one foot on the bottom bar, and of course I say right away, "No, Lucy, don't ever climb on that."
It doesn't help that, whenever we see high-up locations in real life or on video games, Lucy (and now BB parrots this) says, "I could die!" And of course both kids say it right before Lucy makes a move to climb on the railing.
So of course, because I'm a big scary dad when I'm scared for their safety, and because she's my sweet little girl who's probably less insane than I was as a little 4-year-old boy, she took her hands and foot off the railing right away. It was only a second that she was touching it, with both hands and a foot, but it was enough to scare the Dickens out of me.
And now I'm awake in the middle of the night, stressing myself out by thinking, 'What if she did climb on that thing and fall over and I wasn't there to catch her?'
Really productive thoughts, lemme tell you. I figured I'd type up my thoughts. Now I do feel better.
Oh, look, Megan's alarm is going off so she can get to work by 6. Wonderful. I hope the kids don't let me sleep in at all, seeing as how they're what I'm stressed about.
Adding an extra weirdness level is the fact that I cannot stop thinking about my friend Siyoum's new Belgian waffle maker. He made a Facebook update a few weeks ago, asking who wanted chicken and waffles for dinner. And I can't stop thinking about how good that sounds.
For some reason, for about a half hour before I started typing this entry, I was lying half-awake in bed with this (entirely fabricated) stress about my kids falling to their deaths, mixed up with this image of delicious chicken and waffles.
I think my brain is broken. Bzzzt.
Awake at 3:30 a.m., stressing about what could have happened at Target today. See, the Seattle Target location across from Northgate Mall is really high up in the air, and there's a sort of skybridge from the parking garage leading to the store doors.
The skybridge is about 25 ft wide, with a 4ft-wide fence-type railing all along the sides with no gaps. So it's like, secure, you know? But it's still high up in the air. You can look over the edge and see how far you could fall.
I'm scared of heights. Guess I should throw that out there.
So what does Lucy do when we're walking back to the car? Makes a move to climb on the railing! She puts grabs the top bar with both hands and puts one foot on the bottom bar, and of course I say right away, "No, Lucy, don't ever climb on that."
It doesn't help that, whenever we see high-up locations in real life or on video games, Lucy (and now BB parrots this) says, "I could die!" And of course both kids say it right before Lucy makes a move to climb on the railing.
So of course, because I'm a big scary dad when I'm scared for their safety, and because she's my sweet little girl who's probably less insane than I was as a little 4-year-old boy, she took her hands and foot off the railing right away. It was only a second that she was touching it, with both hands and a foot, but it was enough to scare the Dickens out of me.
And now I'm awake in the middle of the night, stressing myself out by thinking, 'What if she did climb on that thing and fall over and I wasn't there to catch her?'
Really productive thoughts, lemme tell you. I figured I'd type up my thoughts. Now I do feel better.
Oh, look, Megan's alarm is going off so she can get to work by 6. Wonderful. I hope the kids don't let me sleep in at all, seeing as how they're what I'm stressed about.
Adding an extra weirdness level is the fact that I cannot stop thinking about my friend Siyoum's new Belgian waffle maker. He made a Facebook update a few weeks ago, asking who wanted chicken and waffles for dinner. And I can't stop thinking about how good that sounds.
For some reason, for about a half hour before I started typing this entry, I was lying half-awake in bed with this (entirely fabricated) stress about my kids falling to their deaths, mixed up with this image of delicious chicken and waffles.
I think my brain is broken. Bzzzt.
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